My Story: At The First Sight Of Love, I Fell For It & Also Got Married, Not Knowing That I Had Embarked On A Volatile Journey
January 25th, 2018
Source: Humans of THANE
“It is said that the name you give to a child shapes its future. Maybe that’s the reason my life story is a sculpture in the making. The Divine Source is working on me just like a sculptor works with an uneven rock, removing unwanted parts and what remains is his most beautiful creation. The process was painful… being chiseled and hammered. But with every beating, I shaped a bit more and a bit more.
As a school girl I was always interested in life after death, trying to figure out exactly how this universe runs and who is the master mind. At the same time, I was unaware of the fact that the process of sculpting had already begun for me. As a young girl I remember yearning to be loved and cared and guided. But unfortunately there was an imbalance of emotions at home. My mother, brother and I lived with extreme fear. The domestic violence at home had unknowingly put me on a search for love out of my home. So at the first sight of love, I fell for it and also got married, not knowing that I had embarked on a volatile journey.
A journey of constantly proving I was a loyal wife, compromising on everything from my friends to my clothes to even the choices I had in term of music, reading, etc. And while I had to keep proving my love and my integrity, I was the one who got cheated. But even then I never had the courage of stepping out of the relationship which was hurting me physically, mentally, emotionally and also financially. In all of this mess, there was a reason for me to smile and that was my daughter Samruddhi. In the meanwhile, my professional life was looking brighter. I had found a purpose to bring smiles on the faces of many children… my students. During this time my daughter stood strong by me and urged me to go for a divorce and choose happiness over ‘what will people say’.
I chose happiness. While the personal life had started crumbling my spiritual journey was slowly but steadily progressing. I was becoming aware of life as a ‘whole.
And then came another knock of the hammer, the school which I co-created after giving up my well paid job was no more a part of my life. I was devastated as I woke up one morning not knowing what to do. It was the most difficult, depressing, disappointing phase of my life where mentally, emotionally and financially I had hit the rock bottom. Not knowing what to do with my life and how to take my 16 year old daughter’s life ahead, I also contemplated suicide. The pain of betrayal from the people whom I trusted the most was beyond explanation.
The turmoil was immense and just what happens to every seed when it is crushed in the mud… it breaks, the seed sprouts and grows. In the same way I grew, and not only did I grow but also learnt to help others grow. By now from my spiritual guides, I had learnt if anything annoys you, it is teaching you patience. Anyone who abandons you is teaching you how to stand up on your own two feet. Anything that angers you is teaching you forgiveness and compassion. Anything that has power over you is teaching you how to claim your power back. Anything you hate is teaching you unconditional love. Anything you fear is teaching you courage to overcome your fear. And anything you can’t control is teaching you how to let go.
I started coaching individuals and couples to live an aware and balanced life. I helped people to see a larger picture and find an opportunity to grow and excel. I designed and implemented a 100 hours training module based on empathy and compassion, for teachers. I am training teachers in and out of the country as I believe one teacher can make, break or shape the lives of thousands of children in her career span. I started a whatsapp group where there are many known and unknown individuals who find solace in the life they live. I post exercises which I have personally practiced and are research proven on the group every day for members to stay positive or to learn to be positive.
I also started Art and Soul, a healing shelter, where people get clarity through creativity. I have blended art, healing and meditation for children and adults.
I am full of gratitude to the Divine Source, who’s master plan was to create a Divine Sculpture. I call myself a Divine Sculpture because I believe I am a part of that ‘whole’ and I have come here with a Divine plan which is to first feel the pain what others go through and help and heal them in their journey called ‘LIFE’.”