My Story: ❝ I Still Don't Believe The Person Behind My Existence Is No More ❞

❝It was like a tradition; mom handed it over to dad and then dad gifted it to me!

As I stepped into college for my graduation, my parents felt the acute need of letting me ride the scooter to college, in order to save time and be an independent girl.
So like a kid who learns to walk holding dad’s hand, I learned to ride a scooter, with dad guiding me. I learned all the intricacies of riding a scooter from my dad; may it be riding or about the engine or any technical issues. I used to cry out for my dad when I needed any help with it.

So on his birthday, I thought of gifting him something precious with the few pennies I had with me. I went to a sticker shop and got ‘daddy’s girl’ written on my scooter.
In the morning, when dad was busy reading a newspaper, I called him to watch out from the window and showed him those words printed on the scooter. There was a big smile on his face; seeing his overwhelming reaction, I couldn’t stop my tears, dad was crying too. But those were tears of joy; tears of love between a father and his brave girl.

I never let anyone sit on the backseat, I lacked the confidence to ride along with someone. One day, in the ground, where I used to practice riding, my father insisted riding along. It boosted my confidence, but I felt the sense of responsibility and nervousness too. We rode back to home and I showed mom that I can ride well now. My dad took me to the RTO to get me a license and after that, I used to ride with him to places and ride my sister to the city for shopping as well.

But then suddenly dad felt sick and I had to take him to the hospital for daily treatment and medication. It was this time when I developed a strong bond with my scooter. Mom would never trust a person’s driving skills but she learned to trust me with the scooter and I never disappointed her. Dad’s illness made me a responsible girl and I could sense that my parents are growing old, I realised that they had carried me all along in this journey and it was now time to share their responsibilities and burdens.

With many struggles, unfortunately, one day the beloved soul, irreplaceable part of my life, my dad departed from this world; I couldn’t believe it. And performing the last rituals was the toughest part.

It was shocking for all of us. I wouldn’t come out of our home for months. I still don’t believe the person, the reason of my existence is no more in this world.
The person who was around me from last 20 years of my life is suddenly nowhere in a moment.

After months of grief and mourning, I realized, dad would never want his daughter to sit home quitting it all and suffer, so lifting myself up I came out of the home and decided to never quit upon anything. I will keep doing things my dad taught me and make him proud because I know he is watching me over. One day I even drove a Harley and I felt solace while riding; as I knew he too is smiling somewhere to see me do that.

With time I learned his existence can’t be seen but only be felt, he is always in my heart, with teary eyes I imagine and hold dear the existence of the reason behind my existence.

And then yet again the “daddy’s girl” scooter was handed over to my cousin, it is still running good, the legacy continues.❞

Submitted By: Mohini Nikam

This story is submitted as a part of the #ActivScooterDiaries series, an effort by Castrol Activ Scooter to encourage women who commute by scooter to share their innumerable experiences with the world. If you too have any remarkable experience with your scooter, share your story here or write at [email protected]